Five Lessons I Learned in 2019

By Kaylin R. Staten

2019 was an up-and-down rollercoaster ride. With each success, a failure appeared to meet its match. Overall, throughout layers of silver linings, I see 2019 for what it is: a season of recalibration and resilience. I’ve released deeply personal writings that have revealed next-level heartbreaks. I’ve worked with amazing clients and partners. I’ve been desk dwelling too much and not exercising enough. I’ve created some business items that I am immensely proud of, and there’s more where that came from. 

As I write this, it doesn’t seem like another year has passed, but here we are. It’s almost the beginning of a NEW DECADE, the next generation of a Roaring Twenties in mind and spirit. 

Here are five lessons I learned in 2019:

Failure teaches you more than successes ever will.

I used to collect achievements. I am a lover of collections, but the perfectionist in me was addicted to career and personal achievements. While I am and always will be an achiever at heart, I have diligently worked on what really matters to me and have started the road to acceptance. Honesty time: I still struggle with self-acceptance, especially with regards to failure. The truth is, I have learned more when my bank account is lower than I want it, when I don’t get that client, when my online strategies don’t pan out like I think they will. Going back to the drawing board and feeling the lowest low is becoming more of a blessing than a curse. It allows me to recalibrate. After all, 2019 has been The Year of Recalibration, and I have been doing that since Day 1. 

I’ve said this before, and I will say it again: “The greatest teacher failure is.” -- Yoda, “The Last Jedi.” 

Keep going, no matter what.

Look, there are going to be days motivation won’t present itself in its wondrous glory. Then, you won’t have the stamina to be productive, either. I’ve had countless cases of writer’s block, bouts of low self esteem, and personal problems that have carried over to Hourglass Media. No matter which odds are stacked against you, you have to keep moving. My power words for the last half of 2019 were: Fearless, Consistent, Happy. I truly believe that consistent, small steps will allow for the biggest returns and happiness levels that are through the roof. So, keep your momentum going on those beautiful, favorite days and in all cases when you can’t imagine still putting one foot in front of the other. This is my everyday battle, especially when anxiety and depression announce their unexpected arrival. The important thing: just keep swimming, as Dory says.

Get back to the basics with your branding and purpose.

I don’t know about you, but I overcomplicate things that should just come naturally and easily to me personally and professionally. When I started my company, I wanted to be a broad jill-of-all-trades who was everything to everyone. Fast forward to this present moment, and I’m continuing to carve out niches that matter to me. Don’t spin your wheels. Don’t do what feels unlike you. Going against your nature will only cause you to be on an everlasting wheel of confusion, discontentment, and general unhappiness. 2019 gifted me with so many lightbulb moments, from establishing an even more cohesive, true-to-me brand to my official purpose, “Live what you love without fear.” Epiphanies have arrived while listening to my favorite podcasts, taking a shower, driving to meetings, journaling, listening to rap music, playing video games. I brainstormed what I wanted my company’s brand to be, and I crafted more collateral items and messaging that fell in line with my authentic self and overall vision. Sit back and listen to your heart. Your intuition will rarely ever fail you. 

Self-love and care is the answer to ruts.

I go through phases of being bored, complacent, and restless. I’m sure we all feel that way from time to time! I have this bad habit of criticizing myself when I’m in a rut and really kicking myself when I am down. My emotions are tied to how I am feeling physically, which leads to a lack of motivation and productivity (see above). My answer to all of this? Take a break! It seems really simple -- a no-brainer, really -- but I have always struggled with taking breaks. Lunch breaks, vacations, those 10-minute-or-whatever breaks you’re supposed to take after 50 minutes of continuous working. Talk a walk, exercise, write a poem, make a personal phone call, talk to your cats. Do what helps you relax and feel focused on yourself and your self-care. I have found that when my self-esteem is in the gutter, it’s directly related to my level of self-care. Oh: and take at least one bizcation per year. I took some time away from my normal office environment during a conference in Columbus. This is something I will begin to implement every year starting in 2020! 

Being a leader is challenging. 

I don’t think any leader will ever say that leading people, projects, companies, strategies, families, and more is incredibly easy. It’s no small feat, and your resilience really comes into play when you’re a leader. I’ve messed up, not followed through with a task, not handled an issue with another person because I deep down hate conflict. I’ve seen the fruits of my labor pay off, people collaborating because of my efforts, forged relationships that will last a lifetime. Leadership is a teeter totter, and I’ve fallen off many times in 2019. I’ve felt alone at the helm and part of a team. I’ve seen people pull their own weight and crash due to the pressure of responsibilities. The important thing is, I’ve learned high-level lessons in leadership -- ones that I will continue to use for the rest of my life. But, it was, is, and will always be worth it. Your girl is a Leo, after all. I was born to lead. :) 

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Kaylin R. Staten, APR, is an award-winning public relations practitioner and writer based in Huntington, WV with nearly 16 years of professional communications experience. As CEO and founder of Hourglass Media, she uses her compassionate spirit and expertise to delve into the heart of clients’ stories. She is a recovering perfectionist, mental health advocate, wife, cat mom and Leia Organa aficionado. Connect with Kaylin on LinkedIn.